Sunday, August 25, 2013

I Am...

My family - June 2013. I'm the short one.
Lately, I've thought a lot about my writing, and what I hope to accomplish with it. I've listened to other writers, watched agents' twitter and blog accounts for a clue to what they want, and tried to pay attention to what is being published.

And I'll be honest, there's a part of me that wants to write what 'they' want.

But that wouldn't be me, being true to myself.

At times I wonder, would some agents be more interested if I were a different person? You know, if I wrote extremely explicit sex scenes (which I don't), if I wrote cheesy romance (don't have it in me), or if I wrote contemporary YA fiction (not my thing). 

Reality is this, I'm a mom, and that definitely impacts what I write. Anything I put on paper should be something I would be proud to allow my children to read - if not today, then in the future. That doesn't mean I'll only write easy, feel-good, PG stories. In fact, I feel like my kids need to understand the 'real' world. I've never been one to hide reality from them or shelter them too much. 

And maybe more than that, if I try to force myself to write things that aren't intrinsically 'me', they won't be well written. My voice needs to be my own. My stories need to be what I want to write - not an attempt to please people I've never even met.

Does this mean that I'll never find an agent I connect with who loves my work? I don't know the answer to that question. What I wouldn't give for a crystal ball right now! 
I do know this - I carry a lot of experience into my writing. It may not be your experience, but isn't that what books are about, carrying us to places we don't typically go?  I also know that I'll continue to write (and get more accomplished now that I'm determined to shake off my worries about everyone else), and I'll press forward in an effort to one day be published.  

I am a writer. I am a wife and mother. I work every day, outside my home and in it. I have amazing children, and my family is the most important thing in my world. I'm determined to keep doing what I love - all of it.
I AM Tina. 

And I rock at being me.  

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